Post by J Doe on Apr 29, 2018 4:35:12 GMT 8
Symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder
www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/borderline-personality-disorder/index.shtml
People with borderline personality disorder may experience mood swings and display uncertainty about how they see themselves and their role in the world. As a result, their interests and values can change quickly.
People with borderline personality disorder also tend to view things in extremes, such as all good or all bad. Their opinions of other people can also change quickly. An individual who is seen as a friend one day may be considered an enemy or traitor the next. These shifting feelings can lead to intense and unstable relationships.
Other signs or symptoms may include:
Efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment, such as rapidly initiating intimate (physical or emotional) relationships or cutting off communication with someone in anticipation of being abandoned
A pattern of intense and unstable relationships with family, friends, and loved ones, often swinging from extreme closeness and love (idealization) to extreme dislike or anger (devaluation)
Distorted and unstable self-image or sense of self
Impulsive and often dangerous behaviors, such as spending sprees, unsafe sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, and binge eating. Please note: If these behaviors occur primarily during a period of elevated mood or energy, they may be signs of a mood disorder—not borderline personality disorder
Self-harming behavior, such as cutting
Recurring thoughts of suicidal behaviors or threats
Intense and highly changeable moods, with each episode lasting from a few hours to a few days
Chronic feelings of emptiness
Inappropriate, intense anger or problems controlling anger
Difficulty trusting, which is sometimes accompanied by irrational fear of other people’s intentions
Feelings of dissociation, such as feeling cut off from oneself, seeing oneself from outside one’s body, or feelings of unreality
=================================================================================================================
This was supposed to be one of my easiest posts to put together. I would just type "Borderline Personality Disorder" into my search engine (Startpage; protects your privacy), copy and paste basic info on borderlines, then add my own text.
But a strange thing had happened. I've done this search and done a quick read/ re-read on BPD for years and everything has been the same. But this time; something different. The sites talked of Borderlines very differently than before.
Previously the results would be full of sites aimed at people having to deal with BPD's. But now the results were aimed at BPD's themselves. They wrote about the BPD sympathetically, including new information from brain imaging work. The end result was a message of "You think BPD's are bad to deal with? Well how do you think it feels to be one? They hurt themselves way more than they hurt anyone else. And when they hurt others it is unintentional and they feel bad about it."
They sounded like victims of their own brain chemistry, helpless and swept along by emotions they could not help feeling. But good news. BPD could now be treated and people who underwent treatment (therapy, preferably Dialectical behaviour therapy), could become so much better, they would no longer fit the criteria for BPD. They could have stable jobs, homes, relationships; everything.
What a change. Because previously there was agreement that personality disorders were for life. They could not be cured, healed, and therapy would have minimal effects.
All of the above symptoms were listed as the defining behaviour of BPD's before, but there were other things too, things that are minimised or missing from the new pages about BPD.
Previously, common behaviours of BPD's included:
Choosing a partner based on what the person could do for them, including elevating their social status, advance their career, choosing someone who was wealthy.
Being jealous of and competitive with other females, including their own daughters. A common behaviour of BPD mothers was to make their daughters look unattractive, so they would not be a threat to male attention. This usually began when their daughters were around 7. They would not let them brush hair, teeth, bathe or put on clean clothes before school. They would urge their daughters to bring home male schoolmates who they would disparage their daughter to, and flirt with.
Constant lying
Extremely manipulative
Constant Victimhood: No matter what terrible thing they did to someone, they would walk away feeling wronged and sorry for themselves.
Could not be single. But also would not do the work needed to hold a relationship together.
Used sex as a tool and a weapon; to get what they wanted, control, punish, blackmail etc.
Were addicted to the kind of sex other people would find risky, wrong, or disgusting.
Always needed to be the centre of attention; were addicted to the spotlight.
Could never be wrong. Could never accept fault or blame for anything
Inflexible, black and white thinking
Extremely shallow, materialistic, and superficial.
Chronic insecurity and low self esteem that led to over reactions, being thin skinned, quick to take offence, grudge holding, and wildly out of proportion anger or despair.
Rage if they didn't get their way.
Character assassination of their "enemies".
Extremely controlling in relationships.
CANNOT be happy. Desperately wanted something/ one as this was the answer to everything, until they got them, then they were the same let down as everyone/ thing else.
Had little insight into themselves and so would carry out the same wrong/ self defeating behaviours over and over, being suprised each time, when it didn't work out.
Always needed centrality. Everything had to be about them. And if it couldn't be about them in a positive way; (everybody envies me, wishes they were, I have all the attention, power and control), then everything was about them in a negative way (everybody is against me, out to get me, it's so unfair....poor little victim me).
Although it says above "efforts to avoid abandonment" it (and the other sites) make it sound like only fear drives this behaviour. But previously it was acknowledged they also had massive ego's which meant they would react with rage if someone left or tried to leave, and would seek revenge on the one who had "betrayed" them with abandonment.
Above it says "Intense and highly changeable moods, with each episode lasting from a few hours to a few days", and most sites now say this. Previously they used to say these intense moods lasted minutes. The BPD would be raging at you like you had committed murder, for burning the toast one minute, and sobbing how much they loved you the next. This caused chronic stress for those living with them and left them always feeling like they were standing on ground that shifted constantly under their feet. This info would have been based on talking to BPD's and/ or those who had to interact with them. So how have brain scans changed this?
The suicide rate for BPD's was 8% but it was thought most of these deaths were accidents as the borderline had not intended to die, but to manipulate someone else. Now not mentioned as a motive on most of these new/ image management pages.
It should be noted that not every BPD has every symptom. And the severity of the symptoms differs also.
-------------------------------------------
When I thought about all the behaviours that had disappeared from the information that was currently being touted as cutting edge info about BPD's, I realised what they had in common. It was the most manipulative behaviours and examples of calculated cruelty.
Because the new information is based on brain imaging and comes with some impressive stats about how much better and more stable BPD's can become with therapy, most people would believe it.
The amount I have read about BPD's means I would have been VERY sceptical. But I would have been willing to give them the benefit of the doubt because time answers all questions. Give them a couple of years and see what happens. Most likely they would make very modest difference to the treatment of BPD's as they realised they had vastly overestimated what a difference their new knowledge would make, and underestimated how resistant BPD's are to therapy. Or anything, were they might have to look at their own behaviour or own any part in their
own problems.
But the way the worst traits of the BPD, the ones that show concious, planned viciousness to others, were excised from the picture, means I cannot give them the benefit of the doubt at all.
I think what we are looking at is an effort from the real terrorists who run the world to make people think better of BPD's, to drop their defences around them. For years, as a reader of both celebrity gossip and true crime, I watched them use BPD's to take down targets. And it looks like that will be ramping up as we get down to the wire.
They may be able to present BPD's the way they want using medical sites but thankfully there are still places that show the full picture of BPD's. Look at the following websites to see that the character traits I have listed of BPD's are 100% part of the picture:
Chump Lady
www.chumplady.com/
This is a site for men and women whose relationships ended due to cheating. See how many of the female affair partners fit the criteria of BPD I gave. Also how many of the wives/ partners of the male "chumps" do. Something I saw over my years of reading, was a borderline would much prefer to have an affair with another womans husband or partner, than date a single man. And given how they loved gloating to the woman whose relationship they helped break up, it was clear who was their real focus.
BPD Family
bpdfamily.com/message_board/
This site mainly caters to people who want to preserve relationships with the BPD and so see them in the best possible light. That's why it's not the answers on this message board that will be helpful, it is the questions.
Read advice columns. Look for letters from or about the type of personality I have described. I have saved letters from advice columns for years that fit this pattern (BPD or BPD traits) and I will add them on another thread. I will also add some true crime movies and documentaries of people with BPD traits so you can see how the psychological knowledge applies in the real world.
In my readings about criminal psychology, true crime, and advice columns, I saw some other behaviours BPD's carried out over and over and over, even though they were not listed anywhere as typical BPD. Eventually I added them to my own list of BPD behaviours, and things to guard against. I am going to list them here.
1. BPD's have a true predator's sense of weakness or vulnerability in another. They would then approach the person, "mirror" them to quickly build a false closeness, get into a relationship with them, then the real person would come out. One of the most common examples of this was the BPD who would approach a man bruised by an unhappy childhood or his parents divorce, tell him they didn't believe in divorce and would never do it; then the real abusive BPD could come out once they were married/ had kids.
2. Another of the most common behaviours was to play "damsel in distress," knowing that many (most?) men would go charging in to save her. I have seen this behaviour destroy so many males and it sickens me. It MUST be pointed out to them as a pattern before they end up blowing up their own life or even in prison because of their need to "save" someone who never needed saving. Who was the ruthless shark to their minnow.
3. When married men were caught having an affair, they would often turn on their heartbroken wives with rage; accusing the wife of never having loved them, of having abused them. Where did all this anger come from? The new beliefs about the wife? How could they behave so viciously in the divorce; doing everything they could to destroy her or leave her destitute? How could they suddenly try or succeed in killing her? They weren't all previously violent. Where do you think it came from?
4. BPD's were drawn to particular careers; teachers, psychologists/ therapists and sex workers (I actually did read in mainstream media from a doctor/ researcher that most strippers are BPD).
-------------------------------------------
Previously, on sites about BPD's, there was info on how to deal with them. And the advice was sparse since there was little any person could do:
maintain boundries.
do not accept abuse. Walk away/ hang up as necessary.
cut off contact temporarily or permanently as necessary.
-------------------------------------------
compare to the new information aimed at BPD's.
www.sane.org/mental-health-and-illness/facts-and-guides/borderline-personality-disorder
Myth: ‘People with BPD are ‘bad’
Reality: People with BPD are often labelled ‘manipulative’ or ‘attention-seeking’. But while the things they do may cause distress, this behaviour results from the symptoms of BPD, not a bad personality.
Myth: ‘People with BPD can't get better’
Reality: BPD is treatable. People with BPD can recover well with good treatment and support.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorder
The stigma surrounding borderline personality disorder includes the belief that people with BPD are prone to violence toward others. While movies and visual media often sensationalize people with BPD by portraying them as violent, the majority of researchers agree that people with BPD are unlikely to physically harm others. Although people with BPD often struggle with experiences of intense anger, a defining characteristic of BPD is that they direct it inward toward themselves. One of the key differences between BPD and antisocial personality disorder (ASPD) is that people with BPD tend to internalize anger by hurting themselves, while people with ASPD tend to externalize it by hurting others.
In addition, adults with BPD have often experienced abuse in childhood, so many people with BPD adopt a "no-tolerance" policy toward expressions of anger of any kind. Their extreme aversion to violence can cause many people with BPD to overcompensate and experience difficulties being assertive and expressing their needs.This is one way in which people with BPD choose to harm themselves over potentially causing harm to others. Another way in which people with BPD avoid expressing their anger through violence is by causing physical damage to themselves, such as engaging in non-suicidal self-injury.
*NOTE*
This is 180 degrees from the past, when it was made clear that BPD's were often mentally, emotionally, verbally, and/ or physically abusive. *END NOTE*
In psychoanalytic theory, the stigmatization among mental healthcare providers may be thought to reflect countertransference (when a therapist projects his or her own feelings on to a client). Thus, a diagnosis of BPD "often says more about the clinician's negative reaction to the patient than it does about the patient" and "explains away the breakdown in empathy between the therapist and the patient and becomes an institutional epithet in the guise of pseudoscientific jargon". This inadvertent countertransference can give rise to inappropriate clinical responses, including excessive use of medication, inappropriate mothering, and punitive use of limit setting and interpretation.
*NOTE*
There are many in the therapy/ psychiatric field who have come to refuse to treat BPD's because they say these people haven't really come for treatment. They want a captive audience to complain to, about all the people who are against them/ wronging them, and react with rage when it's time to look inward and work on themselves. Now, according to most sites, even these learned experts don't know what they are talking about and should be ignored. *END NOTE*
others experience the term "borderline personality disorder" as a pejorative label rather than an informative diagnosis. They report concerns that their self-destructive behavior is incorrectly perceived as manipulative
Manipulative behavior to obtain nurturance is considered by the DSM-IV-TR and many mental health professionals to be a defining characteristic of borderline personality disorder. However, Marsha Linehan notes that doing so relies upon the assumption that people with BPD who communicate intense pain, or who engage in self-harm and suicidal behavior, do so with the intention of influencing the behavior of others. The impact of such behavior on others—often an intense emotional reaction in concerned friends, family members, and therapists—is thus assumed to have been the person's intention. However, since people with BPD lack the ability to successfully manage painful emotions and interpersonal challenges, their frequent expressions of intense pain, self-harming, or suicidal behavior may instead represent a method of mood regulation or an escape mechanism from situations that feel unbearable. Linehan notes that if, for example, one were to withhold pain medication from burn victims and cancer patients, leaving them unable to regulate their severe pain, they would also exhibit "attention-seeking" and self-destructive behavior in order to cope.
*NOTE*
Hopefully you see the manipulation here and wonder, like me, if these people can't control their moods, how are they able to hold in/ hide the worst aspects of themselves until they feel they have the other person where they want them? How does the BPD who is a disordered nightmare at home, become calm, sane, and in control of themselves at work, school, church, in front of friends? *END NOTE*
Stigma
The features of BPD include emotional instability; intense, unstable interpersonal relationships; a need for intimacy; and a fear of rejection. As a result, people with BPD often evoke intense emotions in those around them. Pejorative terms to describe people with BPD, such as "difficult", "treatment resistant", "manipulative", "demanding", and "attention seeking", are often used and may become a self-fulfilling prophecy, as the negative treatment of these individuals triggers further self-destructive behavior.
*NOTE*
If someone undergoes Dialectical behaviour therapy and becomes better, they most likely had implanted symptoms rather than being actual BPD's. I believe many targets have this done to them. Or they were very mild versions of BPD's, compared to the most disordered. I hope targets will act with self interest and get away from anyone who displays BPD traits, with no thought to whether they are "severe" or "mild". They are dangerous to you! Just get away!
I can imagine how some people will take this post. How politically incorrect to hate on people for a "mental illness" they cannot help. Would you similarly tell people to get away from someone with depression? I don't care how nasty I sound. I have seen BPD's do too much damage, especially to targets, to say anything other than get away from them. And for the target who has these behaviours implanted; it is your job to read, understand how they want you to behave and refuse to do it.
*END NOTE*
www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/borderline-personality-disorder/index.shtml
People with borderline personality disorder may experience mood swings and display uncertainty about how they see themselves and their role in the world. As a result, their interests and values can change quickly.
People with borderline personality disorder also tend to view things in extremes, such as all good or all bad. Their opinions of other people can also change quickly. An individual who is seen as a friend one day may be considered an enemy or traitor the next. These shifting feelings can lead to intense and unstable relationships.
Other signs or symptoms may include:
Efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment, such as rapidly initiating intimate (physical or emotional) relationships or cutting off communication with someone in anticipation of being abandoned
A pattern of intense and unstable relationships with family, friends, and loved ones, often swinging from extreme closeness and love (idealization) to extreme dislike or anger (devaluation)
Distorted and unstable self-image or sense of self
Impulsive and often dangerous behaviors, such as spending sprees, unsafe sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, and binge eating. Please note: If these behaviors occur primarily during a period of elevated mood or energy, they may be signs of a mood disorder—not borderline personality disorder
Self-harming behavior, such as cutting
Recurring thoughts of suicidal behaviors or threats
Intense and highly changeable moods, with each episode lasting from a few hours to a few days
Chronic feelings of emptiness
Inappropriate, intense anger or problems controlling anger
Difficulty trusting, which is sometimes accompanied by irrational fear of other people’s intentions
Feelings of dissociation, such as feeling cut off from oneself, seeing oneself from outside one’s body, or feelings of unreality
=================================================================================================================
This was supposed to be one of my easiest posts to put together. I would just type "Borderline Personality Disorder" into my search engine (Startpage; protects your privacy), copy and paste basic info on borderlines, then add my own text.
But a strange thing had happened. I've done this search and done a quick read/ re-read on BPD for years and everything has been the same. But this time; something different. The sites talked of Borderlines very differently than before.
Previously the results would be full of sites aimed at people having to deal with BPD's. But now the results were aimed at BPD's themselves. They wrote about the BPD sympathetically, including new information from brain imaging work. The end result was a message of "You think BPD's are bad to deal with? Well how do you think it feels to be one? They hurt themselves way more than they hurt anyone else. And when they hurt others it is unintentional and they feel bad about it."
They sounded like victims of their own brain chemistry, helpless and swept along by emotions they could not help feeling. But good news. BPD could now be treated and people who underwent treatment (therapy, preferably Dialectical behaviour therapy), could become so much better, they would no longer fit the criteria for BPD. They could have stable jobs, homes, relationships; everything.
What a change. Because previously there was agreement that personality disorders were for life. They could not be cured, healed, and therapy would have minimal effects.
All of the above symptoms were listed as the defining behaviour of BPD's before, but there were other things too, things that are minimised or missing from the new pages about BPD.
Previously, common behaviours of BPD's included:
Choosing a partner based on what the person could do for them, including elevating their social status, advance their career, choosing someone who was wealthy.
Being jealous of and competitive with other females, including their own daughters. A common behaviour of BPD mothers was to make their daughters look unattractive, so they would not be a threat to male attention. This usually began when their daughters were around 7. They would not let them brush hair, teeth, bathe or put on clean clothes before school. They would urge their daughters to bring home male schoolmates who they would disparage their daughter to, and flirt with.
Constant lying
Extremely manipulative
Constant Victimhood: No matter what terrible thing they did to someone, they would walk away feeling wronged and sorry for themselves.
Could not be single. But also would not do the work needed to hold a relationship together.
Used sex as a tool and a weapon; to get what they wanted, control, punish, blackmail etc.
Were addicted to the kind of sex other people would find risky, wrong, or disgusting.
Always needed to be the centre of attention; were addicted to the spotlight.
Could never be wrong. Could never accept fault or blame for anything
Inflexible, black and white thinking
Extremely shallow, materialistic, and superficial.
Chronic insecurity and low self esteem that led to over reactions, being thin skinned, quick to take offence, grudge holding, and wildly out of proportion anger or despair.
Rage if they didn't get their way.
Character assassination of their "enemies".
Extremely controlling in relationships.
CANNOT be happy. Desperately wanted something/ one as this was the answer to everything, until they got them, then they were the same let down as everyone/ thing else.
Had little insight into themselves and so would carry out the same wrong/ self defeating behaviours over and over, being suprised each time, when it didn't work out.
Always needed centrality. Everything had to be about them. And if it couldn't be about them in a positive way; (everybody envies me, wishes they were, I have all the attention, power and control), then everything was about them in a negative way (everybody is against me, out to get me, it's so unfair....poor little victim me).
Although it says above "efforts to avoid abandonment" it (and the other sites) make it sound like only fear drives this behaviour. But previously it was acknowledged they also had massive ego's which meant they would react with rage if someone left or tried to leave, and would seek revenge on the one who had "betrayed" them with abandonment.
Above it says "Intense and highly changeable moods, with each episode lasting from a few hours to a few days", and most sites now say this. Previously they used to say these intense moods lasted minutes. The BPD would be raging at you like you had committed murder, for burning the toast one minute, and sobbing how much they loved you the next. This caused chronic stress for those living with them and left them always feeling like they were standing on ground that shifted constantly under their feet. This info would have been based on talking to BPD's and/ or those who had to interact with them. So how have brain scans changed this?
The suicide rate for BPD's was 8% but it was thought most of these deaths were accidents as the borderline had not intended to die, but to manipulate someone else. Now not mentioned as a motive on most of these new/ image management pages.
It should be noted that not every BPD has every symptom. And the severity of the symptoms differs also.
-------------------------------------------
When I thought about all the behaviours that had disappeared from the information that was currently being touted as cutting edge info about BPD's, I realised what they had in common. It was the most manipulative behaviours and examples of calculated cruelty.
Because the new information is based on brain imaging and comes with some impressive stats about how much better and more stable BPD's can become with therapy, most people would believe it.
The amount I have read about BPD's means I would have been VERY sceptical. But I would have been willing to give them the benefit of the doubt because time answers all questions. Give them a couple of years and see what happens. Most likely they would make very modest difference to the treatment of BPD's as they realised they had vastly overestimated what a difference their new knowledge would make, and underestimated how resistant BPD's are to therapy. Or anything, were they might have to look at their own behaviour or own any part in their
own problems.
But the way the worst traits of the BPD, the ones that show concious, planned viciousness to others, were excised from the picture, means I cannot give them the benefit of the doubt at all.
I think what we are looking at is an effort from the real terrorists who run the world to make people think better of BPD's, to drop their defences around them. For years, as a reader of both celebrity gossip and true crime, I watched them use BPD's to take down targets. And it looks like that will be ramping up as we get down to the wire.
They may be able to present BPD's the way they want using medical sites but thankfully there are still places that show the full picture of BPD's. Look at the following websites to see that the character traits I have listed of BPD's are 100% part of the picture:
Chump Lady
www.chumplady.com/
This is a site for men and women whose relationships ended due to cheating. See how many of the female affair partners fit the criteria of BPD I gave. Also how many of the wives/ partners of the male "chumps" do. Something I saw over my years of reading, was a borderline would much prefer to have an affair with another womans husband or partner, than date a single man. And given how they loved gloating to the woman whose relationship they helped break up, it was clear who was their real focus.
BPD Family
bpdfamily.com/message_board/
This site mainly caters to people who want to preserve relationships with the BPD and so see them in the best possible light. That's why it's not the answers on this message board that will be helpful, it is the questions.
Read advice columns. Look for letters from or about the type of personality I have described. I have saved letters from advice columns for years that fit this pattern (BPD or BPD traits) and I will add them on another thread. I will also add some true crime movies and documentaries of people with BPD traits so you can see how the psychological knowledge applies in the real world.
In my readings about criminal psychology, true crime, and advice columns, I saw some other behaviours BPD's carried out over and over and over, even though they were not listed anywhere as typical BPD. Eventually I added them to my own list of BPD behaviours, and things to guard against. I am going to list them here.
1. BPD's have a true predator's sense of weakness or vulnerability in another. They would then approach the person, "mirror" them to quickly build a false closeness, get into a relationship with them, then the real person would come out. One of the most common examples of this was the BPD who would approach a man bruised by an unhappy childhood or his parents divorce, tell him they didn't believe in divorce and would never do it; then the real abusive BPD could come out once they were married/ had kids.
2. Another of the most common behaviours was to play "damsel in distress," knowing that many (most?) men would go charging in to save her. I have seen this behaviour destroy so many males and it sickens me. It MUST be pointed out to them as a pattern before they end up blowing up their own life or even in prison because of their need to "save" someone who never needed saving. Who was the ruthless shark to their minnow.
3. When married men were caught having an affair, they would often turn on their heartbroken wives with rage; accusing the wife of never having loved them, of having abused them. Where did all this anger come from? The new beliefs about the wife? How could they behave so viciously in the divorce; doing everything they could to destroy her or leave her destitute? How could they suddenly try or succeed in killing her? They weren't all previously violent. Where do you think it came from?
4. BPD's were drawn to particular careers; teachers, psychologists/ therapists and sex workers (I actually did read in mainstream media from a doctor/ researcher that most strippers are BPD).
-------------------------------------------
Previously, on sites about BPD's, there was info on how to deal with them. And the advice was sparse since there was little any person could do:
maintain boundries.
do not accept abuse. Walk away/ hang up as necessary.
cut off contact temporarily or permanently as necessary.
-------------------------------------------
compare to the new information aimed at BPD's.
www.sane.org/mental-health-and-illness/facts-and-guides/borderline-personality-disorder
Myth: ‘People with BPD are ‘bad’
Reality: People with BPD are often labelled ‘manipulative’ or ‘attention-seeking’. But while the things they do may cause distress, this behaviour results from the symptoms of BPD, not a bad personality.
Myth: ‘People with BPD can't get better’
Reality: BPD is treatable. People with BPD can recover well with good treatment and support.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorder
The stigma surrounding borderline personality disorder includes the belief that people with BPD are prone to violence toward others. While movies and visual media often sensationalize people with BPD by portraying them as violent, the majority of researchers agree that people with BPD are unlikely to physically harm others. Although people with BPD often struggle with experiences of intense anger, a defining characteristic of BPD is that they direct it inward toward themselves. One of the key differences between BPD and antisocial personality disorder (ASPD) is that people with BPD tend to internalize anger by hurting themselves, while people with ASPD tend to externalize it by hurting others.
In addition, adults with BPD have often experienced abuse in childhood, so many people with BPD adopt a "no-tolerance" policy toward expressions of anger of any kind. Their extreme aversion to violence can cause many people with BPD to overcompensate and experience difficulties being assertive and expressing their needs.This is one way in which people with BPD choose to harm themselves over potentially causing harm to others. Another way in which people with BPD avoid expressing their anger through violence is by causing physical damage to themselves, such as engaging in non-suicidal self-injury.
*NOTE*
This is 180 degrees from the past, when it was made clear that BPD's were often mentally, emotionally, verbally, and/ or physically abusive. *END NOTE*
In psychoanalytic theory, the stigmatization among mental healthcare providers may be thought to reflect countertransference (when a therapist projects his or her own feelings on to a client). Thus, a diagnosis of BPD "often says more about the clinician's negative reaction to the patient than it does about the patient" and "explains away the breakdown in empathy between the therapist and the patient and becomes an institutional epithet in the guise of pseudoscientific jargon". This inadvertent countertransference can give rise to inappropriate clinical responses, including excessive use of medication, inappropriate mothering, and punitive use of limit setting and interpretation.
*NOTE*
There are many in the therapy/ psychiatric field who have come to refuse to treat BPD's because they say these people haven't really come for treatment. They want a captive audience to complain to, about all the people who are against them/ wronging them, and react with rage when it's time to look inward and work on themselves. Now, according to most sites, even these learned experts don't know what they are talking about and should be ignored. *END NOTE*
others experience the term "borderline personality disorder" as a pejorative label rather than an informative diagnosis. They report concerns that their self-destructive behavior is incorrectly perceived as manipulative
Manipulative behavior to obtain nurturance is considered by the DSM-IV-TR and many mental health professionals to be a defining characteristic of borderline personality disorder. However, Marsha Linehan notes that doing so relies upon the assumption that people with BPD who communicate intense pain, or who engage in self-harm and suicidal behavior, do so with the intention of influencing the behavior of others. The impact of such behavior on others—often an intense emotional reaction in concerned friends, family members, and therapists—is thus assumed to have been the person's intention. However, since people with BPD lack the ability to successfully manage painful emotions and interpersonal challenges, their frequent expressions of intense pain, self-harming, or suicidal behavior may instead represent a method of mood regulation or an escape mechanism from situations that feel unbearable. Linehan notes that if, for example, one were to withhold pain medication from burn victims and cancer patients, leaving them unable to regulate their severe pain, they would also exhibit "attention-seeking" and self-destructive behavior in order to cope.
*NOTE*
Hopefully you see the manipulation here and wonder, like me, if these people can't control their moods, how are they able to hold in/ hide the worst aspects of themselves until they feel they have the other person where they want them? How does the BPD who is a disordered nightmare at home, become calm, sane, and in control of themselves at work, school, church, in front of friends? *END NOTE*
Stigma
The features of BPD include emotional instability; intense, unstable interpersonal relationships; a need for intimacy; and a fear of rejection. As a result, people with BPD often evoke intense emotions in those around them. Pejorative terms to describe people with BPD, such as "difficult", "treatment resistant", "manipulative", "demanding", and "attention seeking", are often used and may become a self-fulfilling prophecy, as the negative treatment of these individuals triggers further self-destructive behavior.
*NOTE*
If someone undergoes Dialectical behaviour therapy and becomes better, they most likely had implanted symptoms rather than being actual BPD's. I believe many targets have this done to them. Or they were very mild versions of BPD's, compared to the most disordered. I hope targets will act with self interest and get away from anyone who displays BPD traits, with no thought to whether they are "severe" or "mild". They are dangerous to you! Just get away!
I can imagine how some people will take this post. How politically incorrect to hate on people for a "mental illness" they cannot help. Would you similarly tell people to get away from someone with depression? I don't care how nasty I sound. I have seen BPD's do too much damage, especially to targets, to say anything other than get away from them. And for the target who has these behaviours implanted; it is your job to read, understand how they want you to behave and refuse to do it.
*END NOTE*